Of Yearning and Discontent

discontentThis first week of Lent has hit me hard.? I’m short tempered, discouraged and fairly certain that we are going to be going around in the same old circles for the next million years.

Rationally I know that’s really not the case, but between Lenten sacrifices, the tease of warm weather followed by snow and sleet, children who are ready to be done with every kind of work or responsibility and all the other stuff, I feel done and maybe even overdone.

Hmp!

Today, I’m sitting here drinking my tea (with no sugar because somehow I thought that would be a better Lenten family practice than giving up meat which makes my psoriasis flare) and realizing that somehow I picked Lenten sacrifices this year that all effect the little bits of space I give myself throughout the days. Not real smart.

My pot of tea morning and afternoon is still drinkable but sugar makes it a pleasure that relaxes for a sip or too. Choosing not to read fiction is something I’ve done before and find useful but at the end of the day when my mind is tired non-fiction can be more than I’m equipped to understand and requires attention and effort when I want to rest.

My soul is filled with longing for ease and tranquility, and when I look around I see clutter, quarreling and general discontent. I’m the captain of this ship called “Homelife” and I feel like we are in a fog on a rocky lee shore!

How to save it?

I’m trying lots of things that pull me towards the cure for discontent. As I tell the children “we get to make choices and we can decide what our reaction to circumstances is.”

Those choices aren’t always easy and sometimes (like today) I have to purpose to make the same choice again and again and again and again……..

Play some music

Speak kindly

Give a consequence for quarreling calmly and sweetly every time

Be consistent

Set an example

Give hugs

Stick to the plan

Smile

Say something funny to break the mood

Wrestle with the eight year old (he thinks its better than hugs)

Meal plan so the load of decision making doesn’t break your brain

Insist that jobs be done well

Call kids back to do jobs until they are done well

Have impromptu movie nights or lunch at Costco (lunch for 6 people for $11!)

Keep praying

Read Scripture

Pray some more- even without words

Remember that self-care is important

Be kind to myself and others

Refuse to accept a verdict on a day of “I didn’t get anything done”

Loving these people is DOING something

Try again tomorrow and the next minute and hour

Recognize and remind myself that discontent that leads to striving for godliness is a GOOD thing

Write things on the whiteboards and blackboards to remind us all of how we want to be

Yearn for spring.

It’s coming….

Even better Easter!

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