This first week of Lent has hit me hard. I’m short tempered, discouraged and fairly certain that we are going to be going around in the same old circles for the next million years.
Rationally I know that’s really not the case, but between Lenten sacrifices, the tease of warm weather followed by snow and sleet, children who are ready to be done with every kind of work or responsibility and all the other stuff, I feel done and maybe even overdone.
Today, I’m sitting here drinking my tea (with no sugar because somehow I thought that would be a better Lenten family practice than giving up meat which makes my psoriasis flare) and realizing that somehow I picked Lenten sacrifices this year that all effect the little bits of space I give myself throughout the days. Not real smart.
My pot of tea morning and afternoon is still drinkable but sugar makes it a pleasure that relaxes for a sip or too. Choosing not to read fiction is something I’ve done before and find useful but at the end of the day when my mind is tired non-fiction can be more than I’m equipped to understand and requires attention and effort when I want to rest.
My soul is filled with longing for ease and tranquility, and when I look around I see clutter, quarreling and general discontent. I’m the captain of this ship called “Homelife” and I feel like we are in a fog on a rocky lee shore!
How to save it?
I’m trying lots of things that pull me towards the cure for discontent. As I tell the children “we get to make choices and we can decide what our reaction to circumstances is.”
Those choices aren’t always easy and sometimes (like today) I have to purpose to make the same choice again and again and again and again……..
Play some music
Give a consequence for quarreling calmly and sweetly every time
Set an example
Stick to the plan
Say something funny to break the mood
Wrestle with the eight year old (he thinks its better than hugs)
Meal plan so the load of decision making doesn’t break your brain
Insist that jobs be done well
Call kids back to do jobs until they are done well
Have impromptu movie nights or lunch at Costco (lunch for 6 people for $11!)
Pray some more- even without words
Remember that self-care is important
Be kind to myself and others
Refuse to accept a verdict on a day of “I didn’t get anything done”
Loving these people is DOING something
Try again tomorrow and the next minute and hour
Recognize and remind myself that discontent that leads to striving for godliness is a GOOD thing
Write things on the whiteboards and blackboards to remind us all of how we want to be
Yearn for spring.
Even better Easter!